


trapped

by electricstars



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Anxiety, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Blood, Blood and Injury, Crash Landing, Cuban Lance (Voltron), Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Flashbacks, Gay Keith (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron) Has Anxiety, Lance (Voltron) Has Issues, Lance (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Lance (Voltron) Speaks Spanish, Lance (Voltron)-centric, M/M, Near Death Experiences, Nightmares, Other, Serious Injuries, Swearing, Written before season 7, basically im very bad at writing romance but i hope the keith/lance is ok????, he cries a lot, i'll add tags as i go, im self projecting w/ this lmao, im so sorry about all the swearing i just realized how much there is in this oof, im very sorry for this, lance loves his voltron family
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2019-06-14
Packaged: 2019-06-24 06:03:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15624192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/electricstars/pseuds/electricstars
Summary: Lance feels trapped in his own mind; memories of the time he died in Red while saving Allura haunts his every breath. Plagued by horrible nightmares, he can't do anything else but stay awake.While trying to hide his problems from Voltron, Lance and the team crash-land on some bizarre planet, and he'll have to pull himself together to save his friends and get them out of there.





	1. thanatophobia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance can't sleep; it's been like this for a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: panic attacks, ptsd nightmares.

Lance can't see. The stygian space around him is suffocating. 

Lance can't hear.

Lance can't feel.

Lance can't breathe.

He's floating.

...

 

 

He's dead.

 

 

His eyes jolt open and he takes a long, shaky breath. His cold hand grasps the oversized t-shirt he slept in, and Lance takes a moment to assess what's around him. It's so, so hot, and he realizes his sleeping bag is strewn across the uncomfortable floor. Lance's royal blue eyes dart across the unfamiliar terrain. This isn't the Castle. For a moment, he forgets where he is; but he catches a glimpse of The Red Lion, cloaked in darkness far from him, and remembers.

After the draining battle with Lotor, the Castle of Lions was reduced to a small diamond shaped crystal that was almost the size of Pidge's palm. Small, but infinitely important. For a long while, that was his home, and he felt sad seeing it gone, with all the memories attached to it, but it had to be done. For their sake. The paladins set a course for Earth to order to meet with Sam Holt, Pidge's father, as well as the Garrison to retrieve the plans to hopefully rebuild the Castle. That, however, wasn't what excited Lance; it was to finally be able to feel the cool rain against his skin, the sand between his toes, and eat his mamá's signature foods. Just thinking of home sent an uncomfortable pang through his heart. 

Of course, this journey took some time: they were billions of light years away, and even with the Lions impressionable speed, it would take a week or two to get there. Along the way, they would stop at small, uninhabited planets to stretch their legs and camp out for the night. Earlier that night they stopped here, on a plutonian planet lush with odd colored trees, which Coran found out was named Virididus by the neighboring alien tribes. They all decided to camp out of their lions tonight, luxuriating in the short moment of peace before they set out again.

He snapped out of his thinking and focused on the fact that he was shaking violently, ugly, gross sobs racking his body. His lithe fingers felt numb and he realized he was holding on to his shirt too tightly. He instead brings his knees up to his chest, cradling his head in his hands. They were sweaty and shaky and he tried to make it stop, but it was too much. Everything was too much.

Lance had been having horrible nightmares; glimpses of his time spent dead in the Red Lion after taking a hit for Allura. It was only natural for him to do so: she was family, after all. He hates the hollow, feather-like feeling that haunts him in his slumber. In his dreams, he was condemned to float in eternal space, and no matter what, he couldn't shake off that feeling. He began to become very jumpy after the incident. The team all assumed that it was just him being nervous about Lotor's plans, but it was his lack of sleep. The smallest, insignificant sound sent him jolting out his seat, wide-eyed. Hunk joked that he looked like a deer in headlights, and the boy couldn't help but agree.

Lance always had trouble falling asleep back when he was in school. He spent countless nights at the Garrison staring at the ceiling, worrying about his classes and grades, although, it never got as serious as this.

The Cuban boy refrained himself from opening up to the team, fearing he would make them lose their time. They were all so busy, with the Coalition, the trip back to Earth, the mess that's the Galra Empire... Lance figured he would wait until things died down to try casually mentioning his awful nightmares. Though, as he sat there, shaking and crying, he wondered if it wouldn't be a bad idea to mention it sooner. Maybe he could wake Hunk up. He would go for one of his bear hugs right now...

_No._ He told himself. _They won't take you seriously. Nightmares? That's something a fucking 5 year old would complain about. Pull yourself together, McClain._ He took a faltering breath, one that made his chest squeeze painfully. _Show them that you can be strong._

He'd fear he would disappoint Shiro, his childhood-hero-turned-mentor, by being weak. Voltron doesn't need a weak paladin. If he showed any sign of weakness during battle, it could be game over for his adoptive family. He felt as though he was already behind; he wasn't proficient in hand to hand combat like Keith, nor was he good in tech like Pidge and Hunk, and he sure as hell wasn't good in Altean alchemy like Coran and Allura. He's just Lance McClain, and that, for him, fucking sucks. They were already burdened with his shit skills; why make it harder for them by adding on a dash of PTSD nightmares? He opted instead to bite back his tongue when his teammates asked about the dark circles under his eyes.

Exhaling his breath, he shimmied his way into his now cold sleeping bag and let his head fall back on his pillow. His legs were shaking and tingling; he could see them move erratically through his covers, but he paid no mind to them. He stared out at the stars and the miniature moon that orbited the planet. His eyes stung with a burning pain that made tears well up in his eyes. He wiped them off with his finger all the while silently telling himself to keep himself awake. His eyelids were heavier than he anticipated, and he caught himself dozing off multiple times. Every time he would tell himself that going to sleep isn't worth it, that dealing with the uncomfortable side effects of sleep deprivation would be so much better than having another nightmare. 

And so, Lance McClain lay on the ground, eyes wide open, staring at the sky until the sun shone over the horizon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you all liked this!! this is my first time posting works on ao3 so im still learning the tagging system lmao
> 
> also i haven't posted fanfiction in such a long time?? so this might be bad idk


	2. autopilot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Voltron team sets out for Earth again, but it takes an unexpected turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! i took a long time updating this fic with a new chapter, but this past week has been hectic and i didn't have much time to write.  
> anyways, i hope you enjoy this chapter!  
> also, for the record: this fic is set before s7 episode 5 c:

Hearing the exotic Virididian birds sing their melody in the morning made Lance think of home.

It made him think all those times he spent sitting in the soft sand near the shore, watching the sun rise above the water, the salty breeze ruffling his hair. He would stay there, immobile, for hours, listening to the waves lap at the sand. The occasional crab would dart in front of him; he always thought they looked kind of funny with pincers the size of it's own body. He befriended one, once, when he was seven. He brought it inside and it gave his dear _abeula_ such a scare he didn't bother befriending one ever again. The thought of home, his family and Earth sent a sad smile across his face.

It seemed like an eternity until his teammates roused from their sleep and started wandering about. Lance, on the other hand, didn't dare move from his sickeningly hot cocoon. Sleep held his muscles in a vice grip and it's like if he forgot how to move altogether, and he believed challenging it would only lead to worse problems. He buried his face deeper into the sleek fabric of the sleeping bag, trying to think of ways to forget about the grogginess that ate away at his very being. The sounds around him were muffled and he could only hear the occasional shuffle of feet as the Voltron team walked around his sleeping bag. They believed he was still fast asleep and didn't want to abruptly pull him from his dreams, however unpleasant they might be. He waited, his warm breath bouncing off the insides of the sleeping bag until a hand gently grasped his shoulder through the fabric. He jumped, feeling his heart beat out of his chest, and peered out. He was met with a soft face etched with the slightest trace of concern, complete with a mass of black hair.

''Oh,'' Lance said, his voice rough and raw from not using it in the past few hours. ''You scared me, Keith.'' The boy was quick to apologize, pulling his hand away from his shoulder, leaving a phantom trace of his fingers.

''Sorry. I wanted to see if you were still asleep. We're leaving in maybe 15 dobashes.''

The Cuban boy cleared his throat and sat upright.''Right. Has Hunk made breakfast or something yet? I'm starving.''

''I think Pidge saved some for you. I'll go check.''.

A minute or so later, as Lance was rolling up his sleeping bag and getting ready to go change in his lion, Keith came back with a neatly wrapped package. ''It's some sort of... space breakfast burrito.'' He quickly explained. ''It's good. But you might want to hurry up getting changed. Allura really wants to leave as soon as possible.''

Lance sighed, tucking his items underneath his arm. ''You can't rush beauty, you know.''. He finished this off with a smirk, already heading towards Red and he heard the faintest huff of annoyance.

Getting dressed was a hassle, mostly because Lance has a bad habit of not keeping his belongings in order. His socks were strewn across the floor and his paladin armor leg pieces seemed to be missing. In the end, he came out of the Lion with a full set of clothes, just in time for Allura's team meeting, too.

''Everyone.'' She spoke up. ''We're going to have to pick who goes where for this trip. We'll simply do like before.'' Out of an old Altean knapsack tied at her waist, she pulled out a bundle of neatly trimmed sticks. ''Whoever picks the shortest one has no passengers. No peeking, please.''

Drawing straws was Shiro's idea. They were set off track last pit stop when a fight erupted about who goes where. Most of it was Pidge complaining about having Kaltenecker in the Lion with her.

_''She'll chew my wires. Look, I love Kaltenecker as much as the next person, but I have a shit-ton of important equipment in there! That cow eats anything she sees!'' Pidge complained.  
_

_''Give her enough food and she'll be fine! You won't even hear her.'' Lance had replied._

_''My Lion's smaller than yours. There's barely enough space for equipment. She's bound to go nuts in there.''_

_An annoyed grunt has escaped from Shiro. ''Alright, enough. How about we draw straws? That way, it's fair.''_

_''Ok, fine.''_

Lance came out with the shortest straw, and let's just say he wasn't too happy about that. The fact that he had to be alone in his Lion with his thoughts scared him. He didn't even have Kaltenecker; they got moved to Hunk's lion. He had the comms, yes, but eventually, his teammates would grow tired of him speaking; they always did at some point. He bit back his words and swallowed hard. _Whatever. Just deal with it._

''Alright,'' He said, putting his helmet on, determined to change the mood he was settling in. ''Let's get this show on the road!''

Very soon they bid goodbye to Virididus and set out on the course marked by Pidge, one that would bring them closer to home. The thought of finally seeing his family again after long years in infinite space made him gush with happiness. He set his Lion on autopilot, letting it drift peacefully through the empty space, and reclined in his seat. The others were talking; mostly Coran, Pidge, Hunk and Allura, though sometimes Krolia or Shiro would butt in to give an opinion. Romelle seemed preoccupied with something in the background; tinkering with some equipment, Lance theorized.

He stayed silent, admiring the wonderful view around him. To his left, he saw the distinct shape of a galaxy. It was astonishingly bright and colorful. For a moment, he thought it was the Milky Way, but before he could get too excited and swerve for it, Coran piped up.

''Oh! It's the Caeruleum cluster. It's multiple different small systems all grouped together. That's what gives it it's wide array of colors.'' Lance knew something was different about the cluster, he just couldn't pick up what. He sees it now: Caeruleum was a little short of a rainbow. It reminded him of arts and crafts back in kindergarten. Splotches of color dotted the group of systems, from blues to light pinks to deep greens.

''Wow.'' Was the only thing that he could muster as they passed by it.

''It looks like if someone threw up Crayolas.'' Pidge said, laughing.

''Way to go and ruin the mood, Pidge.'' He half-joked, and he wished that the lions weren't as fast so he could stare at the cluster for a while longer.

Two hours in and they were already bored out of their minds. Allura attempted to spark up a few rounds of ''human'' games like 20 Questions or I Spy but to no avail. They plunged yet again into an awkward, forced silence, none wanting to speak up. Lance felt this was partially his fault; he was the goofball, after all. He was known for his jokes that managed to cheer his teammates up no matter the situation. Now, he sat, arms on his knees, silent and morose. They had always depended on him to crack the jokes and they never bothered to learn a few. In order to clear up the crushing silence, Lance spoke up, his voice cracking slightly.

''Hey, guys, when you like, think about it, shovels really are a _ground-breaking_ invention. Huh?'' It took them a moment to process what he had said, but they erupted in laughter soon enough.

''Oh my God,'' Keith muttered. ''That was the worse joke I've ever heard.'' He finished his sentence with a short, high pitched laugh.

Lance felt a slight blush warm up his cheeks. He didn't know why Keith's laugh made him blush in the first place. It was an odd but likeable feeling.

The following conversation flowed smoothly, the unpleasant silence having disappeared. Hunk sent a few pictures Coran took of Kaltenecker in the Lion, most of them her trying to force her way in the cockpit. Romelle sent her share of mice pictures through Allura's lion as well, the team melting into a chorus of ''aww!''. Krolia reminiscened about her time with the Blades, telling stories about the antics the younger members.

As they neared the next solar system – one belonging to the Pelliram galaxy, as Coran said – Lance began to feel uneasy. He ran a quick scan of the area he was in to see if there were any ships about, but it came back negative. Haven't seen any Galra ships in a while. Weird. He could only describe the feeling as being watched by some unseen force. The thought of them not being alone in this lonely stretch of the universe made the hair stand up on his nape.

''Sorry to go off topic, but don't you guys find it kinda weird that we haven't seen any Galra ships? Like, at all?''

''It is unusual, yes,'' Allura started. ''But I wouldn't worry too much about it. They can't patrol every square inch in the universe at the same time. The odds of them finding us here are quite low.''

''Yeah...'' Lance said, moderately reassured. ''Yeah. I'm not going to worry about it too much.'' His last statement was more to himself than Allura, trying to console himself.

He had grown silent of the conversation, though it still thrived in the background. He lowered the audio on his comms and grabbed the controls of Red, turning her around so he could look at what was behind him. His eyes flickered over the area in front of him. Nothing.

Though, as he turned around, he swore he saw a faint glint.

He did a double-take, turning around again but he was met with the same darkness that engulfed most of the universe. _Huh. I must be more tired than I thought._ He decided to pay no mind to what he saw. Lance blamed it on his lack of sleep and went back to following his friend's lions. He set the Lion on autopilot yet again and leaned back in his chair. His eyes were starting to sting. He rubbed them mindlessly, wiping away the few painful tears that spilled. He started to become a bit nauseous from his lack of sleep and closed his eyes, preventing him from looking outside the cockpit, where there was too much movement. He took a deep inhale, steadying himself, and exhale a shaky breath. He felt as though he was going to puke today's breakfast and hoped his body wouldn't act upon that. He waited for the wave of nausea to pass, all while listening to his friend's voices talking about anything and everything. Coran eventually told some stories about back when he was a kid in Altea. Granted, they weren't very interesting, but it was better than hearing him sing for 30 minutes straight.

''How far are we from Earth?'' Hunk questioned.

Pidge's reply was quick. ''Gimme a second.'' Lance imagined her pulling up their coordinates and matching them up with Earth's. Of course, this was exactly what she was doing. ''Ok. We're approximately-'' She was cut off short by Hunk's muffled scream, followed by Allura. Startled, Lance pried his eyes open and looked around. A blast of purple engulfed his vision for a brief second. A weak rumble shook the Lion and Red's statistics came up screen. He glared at them for a short while, no damage, thankfully, and turned his attention on Hunk.

What happened became apparent as the Yellow lion's body floated limply across the space in front of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you all enjoyed this! i'm not too happy with the ending but i might rewrite it later
> 
> comments/kudos always appreciated!


	3. fire & the flames

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Yellow Lion is down, and Lance is freaking out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: panic attacks + some swearing  
> (also this chapter is pretty dialogue heavy s o r r y)

''Shit, shit!'' Lance hissed under his breath, grabbing the Lion's controls until his knuckles turned ghostly white. His head spun and he felt bile rise up at the back of his throat. He suppressed it, shaking his head as to clear his mind. He swerved violently right as a purple beam grazed his lion’s flank. ‘’Hunk! Do you hear me? Please-’’ His voice faltered. ''Answer me.''

Everyone was silent as the comms crackled. Hunk’s voice shined through.

‘’I’m good, we're all good!’’ There was a collective sigh of reassurance. ‘’Yellow isn’t, though. She’s completely down. Whatever beam they sent-’’ The space in front of Lance illuminated in a purple hue. ‘’It shuts down the Lion’s entire system. Try to dodge them. I’ll try to get her back online.’’

'’I’ll try to see what sort of technology they’re using.’’ Pidge said, and Lance could hear the little chirp of three different screens popping up in front of her. ‘’Allura, could you watch me?’’

‘’Of course.’’ She said, falling back to guard the stationary Green Lion.

The Black and Red Lions advanced closer to the ships. Lance did a quick survey of the area. A decently sized planet with forest-y looking land was not to far from the battle scene. A good area to retreat if they need to lose them. It looked livable. Hopefully it was. Three galra ships; one mother-ship, two medium sized fighter ships equipped with small beams. He saw Keith advance towards the mother-ship.

‘’Keith!’’ He called through the comms. The lion slowed down a bit. ‘’Let’s get the fighters out of the way first so we can focus on the bigger ship.’’

‘’Good idea. Let’s get ‘em.’’

A sense of pride rose up in him and he gloated to himself. He slammed sideways into an upcoming fighter ship, sending it spiraling farther away from the Lions. He fired a small beam towards the ship Keith was fighting. One of its wings tore off in a fiery blast and it fell under them. Meanwhile, the other fighter jet made its way towards the both of them, hitting Red in the side and knocking Lance into Keith.

‘’Lance,’’ Hunk called, his voice strained as he tried to rewire the Lion’s system. ‘’They’re sending more jets. Out of the mother-ship. Oh m-’’ Lance didn’t hear the rest since Keith yelped on the comms loudly. Three additional ships were circling them. He sent a sweeping beam; it only landed on two. He was getting overwhelmed. The Galran jets sent more and more beams. They kept on peppering the Lion’s surface. His screens turned red as multiple error messages popped up. Left back leg, right flank, left shoulder damaged. He started breathing heavily. He couldn’t even send a beam out; they’d shoot him in the muzzle, stopping the beam from firing. He couldn’t do anything. He felt so useless.

‘’Allura! Pidge!’’ Keith said, his Lion shaking. ‘’A little help?’’

‘’We can’t!’’ Allura answered, her voice strained. ‘’They got us, too! They sent out five jets. I don’t-’’ Something rumbled near Allura’s lion. ‘’I don’t know where the mother-ship is. Watch out for it.’’

The tired boy swerved around backwards, looking for the faintest gleam of the mother-ship. Nothing. ‘’I think-’’ Lance heaved. ‘’I think it has an invisibility cloak or, or something. It straight up disappeared.’’

Lance’s chest crumbled on itself. He was overheating, sweating profusely from his forehead. His hands were clammy; he lost his grip as swerved the jet’s multiple beams. He felt out of breath and struggled to get a few good breaths in. He recognized this as a panic attack, something familiar to Lance. He'd have the occasional one every once in a while at the Garrison. His mother always said he was a naturally anxious person.

‘’I’ll scan the area again.’’ Pidge said. ‘’Lance, you ok? Did you get hurt?’’

His heart faltered. ‘’I’m… I’m fine, really, just tired from the battle. Fine.’’

 

He could tell, even without Pidge replying, that she wasn’t convinced.

 

He started firing off random beams, only a few actually hitting. It was a miracle he could even fire some without getting intercepted.

‘’Lance.’’ Keith’s voice was clear, without worry. How does he do it? Is he secretly scared shitless? Lance would probably never know. ‘’Take the two to your right. Don’t fire your beams, they suck your power. Body slam them or something. I’ll take the rest.’’

‘’A-alright.’’

He swerved violently, yet again, to his left, hitting one square in the middle and hooking the other one’s wing. The wing bent unnaturally, metal and unknown alloy splitting and breaking. The ship he slammed did some sort of half flip, before coming back to him full speed.

‘’I can’t-’’ Pidge said. ‘’I can’t get rid of them. There’s just more and more coming in and I don’t even know where they’re coming from!’’

‘’The mother-ship!’’ Keith said, impatient. ‘’Did you find it?’’

‘’No!’’ Lance’s heart dropped. ‘’Sonar scans, thermal scans, nothing’s fucking showing up, and now I have five of these bastards after me!’’

‘’Keith!’’ Allura called. ‘’What do we do?’’

Keith hummed to himself, trying to think of something. ‘’We can’t beat them, not without Yellow. We’d need to form Voltron. Hunk, any luck?’’

‘’No.’’ Coran answered instead of Hunk this time. ‘’He’s in the back with Krolia. I’m trying to reconfigure the main board. Nothing’s working. It’s unlike something I’ve ever seen.’’

‘’Damn.’’ Keith whispered hoarsely. ‘’Guys, I think we might have to make a run for it.’’

‘’How?’’ Pidge asked. ‘’There’s at least six after Allura and I, and I imagine the same for you two. That, and Hunk’s offline.’’

‘’Pidge, Allura, hook him up to either of your Lions. Just scatter on the count of three. Towards the planet. Maybe we can lose them in the dense forest there.’’

 _Hey, that was my idea_! Lance thought quickly.

‘’Alright.’’ He answered, still feeling out of breath and weak.

''Sounds like a plan.'' Shiro said.

‘’One,’’ Lance dodged another beam, not bothering fighting back. ‘’Two…’’ In the background, Allura chirped something about how she successfully hooked up the Yellow lion to hers. They were ready. ‘’Three!’’

With all the force he could muster, he pushed on the controls and sped forwards towards the planet. Keith followed behind him, shooting one final stray beam. The blue lion zigzagged between the jets, Yellow in tow behind her. Green stuck in the middle. They were getting closer and closer towards the planet. He felt a slight tug forwards, what Lance realized after that it was just the atmosphere pulling them towards the planet. He pressed harder on the controls even though it probably wouldn’t do anything. They were about to start slowing down as to not crash right into the planet when a large Byzantium purple blast shook Lance to his core. He felt the rumble shake his ribs and he swore his heart dropped to his knees. Everyone let out loud, pained screams and Lance watched as all of his friends Lion’s powered off. The mother-ship, hidden underneath it’s invisibility cloak, towered over them. It had succeeded. The five lions made their descend towards the planet at breakneck speed. Lance tried to open up his Lion, as he’s always done, but to no avail. Nothing was working.

''Please.'' He muttered. ''Come on, Red.''

'’What happened?” Lance could hear Krolia in the background of Yellow’s Lion.

‘’We got hit,’’ Lance’s breathing was getting more irregular. ‘’The mother-ship. It’s behind us. We’re all gone. Shit. Oh my God. We’re-’’

He was panting at this point. The red alert message made his eyes water with how bright it was. The alarm was deafening and he thought his ears might start bleeding if he listened to it for a second more.

Pidge was the first to hit the exosphere. She was mid- sentence when her comms briefly disconnected. Then, it was Allura. Romelle was screaming bloody murder in the background, followed by Allura. They both desperately tried to revive the lion but nothing was moving. The cable holding Yellow snapped with a metallic noise.

‘’Oh, no, shit, the cabl-’’ Hunk cut off. He entered the exosphere.

He watched with teary eyes as his friends all plummeted to different locations. Pidge landed in a dense patch of forest; a small cloud of dust could be seen from the surface. Allura’s lion spiraled in a nose-dive towards some sort of lake. Hunk’s lion skidded across some plains, leaving a long streak. Lance and Keith were the last ones to fall. In the corner of his eye, he saw the Galran ships make their retreat.

 _They’re not even coming after us_.

The lion’s muzzle started to heat up as he got closer and closer to the exosphere. He scrambled to his controls, desperately trying to make a last resort move. Suddenly, Keith popped up on his screen. A video feed.

His eyes were red and puffy. He sniffled once. Lance came to the quick conclusion that he had been crying. It was a slap to the face to see Keith like this, let alone the fact that Keith allowed Lance to see him like this. He used his gloved hand to wipe away a few tears threatening to spill again. Something inside him wanted desperately to climb into the Black Lion's cockpit and wipe his tears away for him, to tell him everything would be ok.

‘’Keith.’’ Lance said, his voice hoarse. The alarms beeped louder. There were more alerts popping up. Overheating in the head area, damaged tail, the whole one-two punch. ‘’Keith.’’ He clung on to the presence of his close friend.

‘’Lance, I love you.’’ His whole world slowed down. Time was altered in a way he couldn’t describe. A light feeling swirled in his chest, almost like a thousand little butterflies. Three words he’s yearned to hear for years. He wished they weren’t in this circumstance, but despite the situation, Lance wouldn’t give this moment up for the world. He cherished this sweet moment in what would be his last waking minute.

‘’I love you too.’’

And all was black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!  
> i forgot i had this acc lmao. this year has been wild; i've been dealing with some mental health issues. im back! i got my writing mood back up so here's this i guess.  
> s8 killed me. bring allura back.  
> ill be continuing this fic as i left it: where allura's still alive.
> 
> hope you enjoy! xx
> 
> writeblr: camisadowrites


	4. aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance deals with the aftermath of the crash.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: blood, injuries + swearing
> 
> sorry for slow updates yet again, finals have absolutely been kicking my ass!!!  
> also this is pretty dialogue heavy sorry oop
> 
> enjoy :^)

Lance awoke to the smell of smoke, the searing, bubbling pain in his side and a killer fucking headache.  
His first breath of air was choked, and he instinctively brought his hands up to his throat. He coughed deeply, making his chest tingle with pain. He said there on the metallic floor, steadying himself. It didn’t take long for him to remember what happened. It’s not something you forget easily. Slap that on the list of trauma he’s endured. Carefully, he sat up, his head spinning slightly. Alright, no getting up then. A cold current blasted behind him. The boy turned around behind him, where he noticed a huge tear in the Red Lion’s flank.  
He dragged himself to the rip. The sturdy, thick metal tore apart like paper, shredded to pieces. Below him lied a deep gorge, black as space itself. Around the lion’s limbs were thick, forest green vines with beautiful golden flowers blooming around it. Through the rip, he could see the Lion’s jaw held open by a thick amalgamation of the plant. The Lion swayed slightly in the soft breeze. One quick move and he plummets to his death. His heart dropped in his chest and he looked away before the vertigo really got to him. His palms became slick with sweat and he dragged himself away from the ledge before he lost his grip and fell. He propped himself up with one arm on a spare crate, smashed open on one side. He ran a hand through his hair, tugging at the knots and dried up blood. Biting his lip, he swore quietly.  
‘’How the fuck am I going to get out of this one?’’  
His helmet, tossed aside in the crash, looked relatively okay. He picked it up and placed it with a bit of pain on his head. It flickered open and that’s when Lance noticed one large crack snaking its way through the glass. He tried communicating with the rest of the group.  
‘’Hello? Anyone there? Keith? Hunk?’’ He waited a second. Static. ‘’Pidge?’’  
Nothing. Radio silence.  
He contemplated the silence for a while, hands in his hair yet again. Would he die here, alone, in a broken ship? He can’t get up, he can’t go down. He’s stuck. He could try to climb the vines, but he wasn’t quite sure where they’d lead him. That, and he’s got some injuries he should take care of.  
He deserted his chest and arm pieces. He threw them off into the mess at the back of the Lion. The boy hitched his shirt up, exposing the bruised and cut skin around his left ribs. He prodded it a bit, hissing quietly when he accidentally brushed against the open wound. It wasn’t fatal, he determined by a hasty self-evaluation, but it still needed to be cared for unless he wanted a nasty infection. And in this neck of the woods, he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to get the things he needed to heal it. He slid off the crate and towards a half empty water bottle. With his teeth, he ripped off part of the under-suit at his ankles and wet it. The cold bite of the rag was enough to make him audibly yelp. It stung, at first, but he grew used to it quickly. He wiped off the dried blood, revealing a less than pretty gash the size of his bicep embedded in his ribs. It throbbed with pain and he looked away. He cleaned up his cheek, where the blood from a small wound in his head was smeared around like some sort of modern art piece.  
He drank the rest of the water in greedy gulps. Once he was done, he crushed the bottle between his hands, just to feel something other than pain. The three suns of the planet shone through a tear in the ceiling. He moved towards it, basking in the soft, yellow rays.  
‘’Lance? Lance!’’ The call was distant but he heard it nonetheless. <em>Don’t tell me I’m going crazy</em>.  
‘’Lance?’’ The call came closer and closer. He tilted his head up towards the sound.  
‘’Keith?’’ His voice was scratchy, raspy, unused and somewhat dehydrated.  
‘’Oh my God, Lance. Lance, where are you?’’  
‘’Keith? Shit, Keith, holy shit, I’m down here. Are you ok?’’  
Some footsteps shuffled towards the ledge of the ravine.  
‘’I’m ok, I swear. Are you ok, though? Are you hurt?’’  
‘’I’m not too peachy right now, dude… I…’’ He trailed off.  
‘’Where are you? Wait, are you in the Lion?’’  
‘’Yeah, I’m down here. I can’t get out. I’m hurt.’’  
A few rocks tumbled down the ravine. He watched them fall from his spot in his ship, and waited for the sound of the rocks hitting the bottom. But it never came.  
‘’Are you alright? Ok, wait one second, I’ll be right back, ok? Don’t move.’’  
Lance heard Keith sprint off into the distance. The Lion was eerily quiet again. Keith came back in what Lance assumed was 5 minutes tops. The Cuban boy shuffled to the rip in the flank. He looked up, and he could see Keith’s silhouette.  
‘’Alright, Lance, I’m going to throw a rope down, ok? I want you to tie it around your waist. And hold on. I’ll try to pull you up.’’  
‘’Listen, I know you’re all strong and mighty but I still weigh a fuck-ton.’’  
‘’I don’t care. I’m going to get you out of there. Try to scale up the wall at the same time.’’  
The rope landed squarely next to Lance. With fumbling hands, he tied a slip-knot and tightened it on his waist. With moderate difficulty, he stood up, only swaying slightly.  
He looked down at the abyss below him. ‘’Keith, I’m scared.’’  
‘’I know. I am too. But the rope attached to this huge boulder. Is your knot tight? You should be fine.’’  
Lance took that as a sign to quadruple-tie his knot. ‘’What should I do?’’  
‘’Ok, uh, this might sound really crazy but I want you to just let yourself fall. The ropes going to run out and I’ll pull you up from there.’’  
‘’Holy shit, are you… are you serious?’’  
‘’I don’t know how else we can go through with this. Is there a ledge you can hold on to?’’  
Lance scanned the stone wall, desperately praying he’d find a little overhang so he wouldn’t have to fling himself into the deep dark unknown. None.  
‘’N-no.’’  
Keith audibly sighed from up ahead. ‘’Alright. You’ll… you’ll have to jump. Please. Just trust me on this one.’’  
‘’Ok, ok, I’m good.’’  
‘’You’re good.’’  
Lance sat down, letting his feet dangle in the emptiness. He wrung his hands together.  
‘’Whenever you’re ready.’’  
Inhale. Keep it in. Exhale.  
‘’Alright.’’ The brown-haired boy said. ‘’Alright. One… Two… Three!’’  
He let himself slide off the lion. The wind whipped his face and he let out the shrillest screech he’s ever heard. Even with closed eyes, he managed to find the rope and held on to it like a koala to a tree. After what seemed like hours of falling, he finally stopped. His heart started beating so fast he could feel it in his whole body, all the way to his toes and fingers. First, he looked down. It was pitch-black and he was momentarily disoriented. He craned his neck up, slowly but surely, squinting at the light.  
‘’Lance? You ok?’’ Keith was practically screaming. He has to be far down.  
‘’I’m good!’’ He yelled back.  
There was a soft tug at the rope and he noticed himself get hoisted up. He grabbed the rope with his two hands and started scaling the wall vertically. It took a lot of work, especially in his arms, but he didn’t want to make Keith do all the work. He tripped a few times scaling up, dangerously dangling in the dark. But every single time, Keith had his back. By the time he reached the top, he broke out in a cold sweat and a thin veil of it has appeared on every square inch of his body. With the last of the power left in his arms, he pulled himself over the ledge and flopped on the sandy earth. Keith did the same, falling next to him, and Lance rested for a while, listening to him breathe heavily. Finally, the black-haired boy turned around, facing him for a brief moment before sitting up. Lance followed suit.  
‘’Keith-’’ He squeaked out his words. He started shaking, on the verge of tears, shaken up. He couldn’t continue his sentence. Keith darted towards him, wrapping him in the tightest hug. His fingers squeezed at his shoulders and he buried his face deep in the crook of his neck. Carefully, Lance slid his hands towards him to hug him back.  
‘’It’s my fault.’’ He says when they break the hug.  
‘’What?’’  
‘’It’s my fault.’’ He repeats. ‘’If I would of just… paid attention to my surroundings we wouldn’t be here. I saw the fucking ship, Keith, but I didn’t know it was the ship. If… If that makes sense.’’  
Keith looked at him blankly, trying to decode what he was trying to say.  
‘’I’m sorry.’’ A tear threatened to spill, and he wiped it away before he could notice.  
‘’You don’t need to apologize.’’ He murmured. ‘’It’s not your fault the Galra came.’’  
‘’But it’s my fault we’re here.’’  
‘’No, it’s not. Nothing is your fault, ok?’’ Keith was being uncharacteristically soft.  
He nodded. The Black Paladin’s gaze shifted to the wet, reddish spot on his ribs.  
‘’Are you hurt?’’  
‘’Yeah. Nothing big though.’’  
‘’Oh, right, ‘nothing big’ my ass. It looks like you have an open wound.’’  
With a grunt, Keith got up and dusted himself off. ‘’Can you walk?’’  
‘’Yeah.’’ Lance took his friend’s outstretched hand and got up as well. His knees cracked softly and briefly wondered if Keith heard it.  
‘’My Lion crashed a good ten minute walk from here. The cargo’s pretty intact. I think I should be able to find something for you.’’  
Too tired to answer, Lance nodded. Keith playfully grabbed Lance’s shoulder. ‘’Save your breath. We have a lot to talk about.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you enjoyed!!!! 
> 
> comments/kudos always appreciated!!!!!!!


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